Irritations

If you know me, or if you've ever had a conversation with me, you may have picked up on the fact that I'm easily irritated. Unfortunately, as of late, I've found myself to be more and more easily irritated. There are three questions, in partiular, that tend to push my "buttons":

1. Is your husband home?
(NO, he's floating around in paradise somewhere while I soak up the heat and humidity of Norfolk).

2. Do you have a job?
(NO, I've spent the last 23 years of my life in school and now you can put me on the unemployment list).

3. When are you going to have a baby?
(NO, and I don't even dare list the sarcastic remarks and socially unacceptable remarks that often come to my mind when I am asked this question...).

There, now I feel better.

And here we go...here we are...

Just got back from Boston, Newport, NYC trip visiting Adam. Hard to sum up the trip in a few sentences. Lots of sightseeing at famous places and lots of good food (my favorite part of vacation/traveling).

I loved the cities but I also loved the "Gatsby" feeling of Newport. I enjoyed touring the mansions and soaking up the culture and the peacefulness that comes from looking at dead people's former residences (seriously). Another highlight was seeing Shrek on broadway in NYC. I kept trying to wrap my mind around how the costumes were put together. How did they do that?? Ground zero was cool on 9/11/09 but didn't affect me as much as I expected it to. Perhaps it was the crowds and the rain (two of my least favorite things combined).

Now it's back to Norfolk. I'm looking forward to getting my disseration draft back from my chair tomorrow so I can make headway towards the finishline. So close, yet so far. While away from my dissertation for the past few weeks while it was being edited and reviewed, I've been lackadasical and uncaring, which are two feelings I don't particularly enjoy. However, I know that once I open up that attachment my drive will come back to me in full force.

This week: meetings, meetings, meetings, class, class, supervision, supervision, supervision. Thinking about taking a part time job for a few hours a week but trying to figure out if that's going to put me over the edge, as my mother would say.

Navy spouse update: looks like Adam is heading out for a 7 month deployment beginning in January. He will also be gone October and most of December...

Reflections

I've been thinking a lot about how my life has changed in the past 1.5 years.

In the spring of 2008, before I moved back to Norfolk to go to ODU, I was fully immersed in the Williamsburg way. I woke up early each morning, heading to Jamestown High School while watching the sun rise over the river. I used to get a rush just crossing over the building's threshhold as I looked up and spotted students that I knew, greeting them with an automatic, easy smile.

My day was filled with much of the same. After hanging out in Sherlanda's Spanish class or sitting with the secretaries in the guidance office eating chocolate and listening to them gossip about just about everyone in town, lunchtime would roll around and I would saunter into the cafeteria to see who I could see.

After visiting each of the four lunch periods and poking my head into the PE classes, I'd transverse the hallways one more time to make sure everyone was happy and healthy. Then, I'd either get the gym ready for basketball practice or head to class at WM or both. My day would end in the JHS gym, a walk through Colonial Williamsburg, or a visit to the cemetery with a friend. Can you believe I got paid for this?

Now, as of summer 2008, I'm in the doctoral student world of wonders at ODU. My days consist of getting myself, my house, my husband, and my dog organized in the mornings. Meanwhile I'll write, research, check my email a million times, and daydream about an easy dissertation journey. Then, it's off to campus to meet with professors or doc students or to supervise Master's students. I'll sit in class thinking about how to change the world (or, um, about how id rather be at home with my husband and my dog). On a day with variety, I'll present at a conference, visit schools in Newport News, or stay holed up in the library for some reason or another. Overall, much of my focus is on my pending future, mainly about how I'm going to pull off this dissertation and if it's all really going to be worth it in the end. And then there's the whole marriage thing, which is wonderful, by the way.

While I feel like I've jumped from two different worlds, I can't say that one is better than the other. It's amazing how life can change so quickly. I am trying to concentrate and focus on being thankful for both experiences and in awe of the blessings that I have recieved at this moment in time, as HE has made everything perfect in HIS time. Isn't that hopeful?

**Inspired by a lovely conversation with the lovely Ms. Abby Weitz

First post (wooooo)

Still trying to figure out of I'm going to like this blogging thing. I figure it will give me a good outlet for writing that doesn't involve a huge pile of counseling articles and APA citations at the end of every sentence. so to start things off, here's my life in a nutshell:

• trying to figure out the whole marriage thing. (it's fun, really). add the military part in...figuring out how to be a wife, but an independent wife, who knows how to lanscape the yard and other such things (umm...landscaping, by the way, is somewhat addicting...if you do it you know what I'm talking about... )


• not only have i recently become a wife, i've recently become a dog owner, even though i thought i hated dogs. oh, the irony of my inner world. i guess it was too much dog sitting in college that gave me a negative outlook. like landscaping, being a pet owner is somewhat addicting (and expensive...)


• trying to figure out the whole phd student thing. just when you think you've gotten the hang of it, something gets thrown your way and you're back to ground zero. and by ground zero, i mean negative three or four. but this too shall pass (ummm, hopefully).

overall, feeling very blessed in my life right now and i remind myself to be thankful when i tend to start focusing on negative things (which for some reason, i suspect, is linked to my personality...). i love my husband and being married and i love living in my new (clean) house (who knew i would be into the whole decorating thing). i'm also very thankful for my good friends (whom i am working on seeing more and breaking out of my introverted/hermit-like tendencies which are often propelled by my affection for my home- catch 22??).

other than that, im looking forward to visiting adam/having a vacation from norfolk up north in newport and boston in a week in a half...